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Shotgun wedding - a case of wife or death.
 
There's nothing worse than a snotty doctor's receptionist who insists you tell her what is wrong in a room full of other patients. I know most of us have experienced this. You got to love the way this old guy handled it.

An 86 year old man walked into a crowded doctor's office. As he approached the desk, the receptionist said, 'Yes sir, what are you seeing the doctor for today?' 'There's something wrong with my dick,' he replied.

The receptionist became irritated and said, 'You shouldn't come into a crowded office and say things like that.'

'Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you,' he said. The receptionist replied, 'You've obviously caused some embarrassment in this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your ear or something and discussed the problem further with the doctor in private.

'The man replied, 'You shouldn't ask people things in a room full of others, if the answer could embarrass anyone.' The man walked out, waited several minutes and then re-entered. The receptionist smiled smugly and asked, 'Yes?'

'There's something wrong with my ear,' he stated. The receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice. 'And what is wrong with your ear, Sir?'

'I can't piss out of it,' the man replied. The doctor's office erupted in laughter.
 

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